Cutting homework stress:
Tips from a parenting book
I recently came across some great tips in How to Talk When Kids Won’t Listen by Faber and King. They’re so good I had to share them. Maybe this will help ease the stress that homework can bring.
- First meet your child’s basic needs.When they get home from school, encourage them to unwind and let their mind wander. And Make sure they’re well fed if they need a snack.
- Acknowledge their feelings of frustrations–making sure it’s clear you’re on their side. Some helpful statements to consider: “Ugh. the last thing I’d want to do after school is to sit down and do more school work. ” Or: “Wow, that is an awful lot of work they gave you.”
- Give choices. This helps kids feel more in control. Try: “Do you want to work alone in your room or out in the living room?” Or “Would you prefer to ride your bike first, then do your homework or vice versa?”
- Adjust expectations. Respectfully tell the teacher that your child is taking forever to finish, so you’re going to set a time limit using the suggest duration from the school (30 min?). Or maybe the reading log has soured your child’s views on reading…so you’ll “relieve the teacher’s obligation” of encouraging your child to read, and opt out of the reading assignment.
- Problem solve w/ your child. Say, I hate nagging you to do your homework and you hate the endless hours of it. The problem is that the school gives us a hard time if it’s not completed. Maybe you’ll promise not to discuss it until afte dinner. Or you’ll set a time limit the school suggests.
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